To trust oneself, is a difficult concept to grasp, which is most likely why the concept seldomly gets understood beyond embodiment-lacking, self-improvement affirmations. Since “myself” is made up of so many various parts, when we say that we trust ourselves, it is necessary that we go into the details of it in order to understand what it means.
To trust oneself, one has to get out of victimhood-mentality.
Victimhood – mentality can develop from racial differences, socio-economic differences, gender differences, sexual orientation differences; or as result of being bullied, abused, raped, imprisoned. It can develop through an unlucky event, an accident, an unexpected bankruptcy, a toxic relationship. It can be societal, generational, and can even be location-specific. When we have been conditioned with victimhood-mentality, we see life as an unfair orchestration, where the bad guys win with their nonchalant power.
With a victimhood-mindset, even when we choose to leave situations, we will look back and feel taken advantage of. We will look back at precious relationships, and see how we have been a doormat, a convenient use. We will look back at things we did and label it as a waste, since we didn’t get anything out of it. We will feel cheated with our time, our input and resources. We will refuse to admit that those who were with us, truly loved us, we will refuse to admit that we left situations out of free will, because we saw something better for ourselves, we will refuse to admit that where we are, is actually where we want to be.
Because our sense of self-worth is not given any opportunity to exist, we will naturally find ways to dismiss even the slightest opportunity for recognition to ourselves and our decisions. This happens so deeply that we are completely unaware of it.
Thus, when you say: “I trust myself,” you are actually saying that you are exactly where you want to be, you have chosen this project, or that situation, AND THUS it is good; then there is no more possibility to blame, to find excuses, or to diminish yourself in it. Then it is not by accident or coincidence that things are happening. Then you are no longer subject to some imaginary god or universe outside of you, be it a good one or a bad one, to govern your way.
With this short line, and the embodiment of it, meaning the part where you recognize “and thus it is good,” you are at the beginning of creation. Although, if you are coming from a trauma body, one of victimhood, then that is a topic for another time, as the greatness of it can be overwhelming.
Of course change is scary, and letting go of a feeling that has always been there, in this case the feeling of fear that masks true empowerment will probably not just disappear with one short realization. Yet, taking the courage to experience, just once, what it feels like to trust yourself, will surely plant more seeds and the process would have started.
May we all live embodied empowerment.