Inner Child Healing for Relationship Success.

We all strive towards healthy relationships, especially in our most intimate settings, yet it is in close environments where so many people are struggling to maintain happiness.
The yearning is there for so many to be able to come home after a day’s work and let out the day’s frustrations, to be met by a loving, kind, compassionate partner who listens and loves unconditionally, who puts us back in a state of balance, who reminds us what is important and all go to bed happily and peacefully.
The reality, however, is quite the opposite. We go home, listen to everyone else’s dramas and when finally we let ours out, the only thing that get’s reflected back is the self-blame and frustration we’ve already been dealing with the whole day. It’s not uncommon to turn to our children for a little tender loving comfort, and while they may set us at ease with some surprisingly insightful upliftment, at our core we know that we are unfairly furthering the cycle of dependency through them.
The truth is that all our needs and desires of today has been programmed into us from a very young age, or sometimes even from previous lifetimes. Our bodies are containers of memory and can help us access memories where limiting beliefs about ourselves where formed.
At it’s core, most of us may reach awareness of limiting beliefs that we are not good enough, that we don’t fit in, or that we have to protect ourselves, yet even though these beliefs are about ourselves, they are so intelligently hidden and masked that they are often unrecognizable. We tend to see the imperfections in our relationship parters so much easier. Or one mask deeper, we don’t even see the behavior of our partners, we simply feel discontent, disappointed and frustrated within ourselves, not knowing what to do with it or where it comes from. We may also attract partners who continually enforce the negative beliefs about ourselves.
The good news is that we CAN restore the goodness we deeply long for and believe in. There is a reason we yearn for it. Because we, as humanity, are on a path of healing and evolution, we all have the intuition of wholeness, a sense of belonging and unbounded love. It is our own suffering that pushes us to our limits of needing to connect to wholeness to make it through.
The way to access healing, is by picking up the little pieces of this wholeness that was lost along the way of growing up.  Little landmarks were left for us, by us, like in the story of Hansel and Gretel,where we leave the trail, but it gets lost and only after much struggle do we find a way home again. We have to use our intuition to go back and connect the parts of ourselves in order to come home. Coming home to oneself is the start of the journey of wholeness. It is this relationship we unknowingly crave for in our partners. It is the tender care and acknowledgement and understanding that we all deserve and the way to access it is through the inner child.
Inner child Journey work is the most effective way to a wholesome relationship with yourself. It is through this relationship, that all other relationships flourish.
Classical indications that you ay benefit from inner child work include:

  • Unexplained anger outbursts.
  • Wanting to control the behavior of those closest to them.
  • Fear of abandonment and rejection.
  • Feeling that people do not like them.
  • Problems with intimacy.
  • Feeling unworthy, not good enough.
  • Fear or hostility towards authority.
  • Not comfortable with challenges.
  • Intimidated by sex, or their love partners.
  • The need to be perfect of always right.
  • Addictions of all kinds.
  • Afraid to express their needs.
  • Uncomfortable with love and affection.
  • Hidden shame of self.
  • Choose partners that are emotionally absent or abusive.
  • Not able to ne authentic about true feelings.
  • Guild over not living up to expectations of others or self.

CranioSacral Therapy as an art form.

CranioSacral Therapy is a manual therapy technique, which manages to combine so many expressions of the healing arts. The founder, Dr. John Upledger, an osteopathic doctor and musician found an entry point to the human body through CranioSacral Therapy, which leads much deeper into the body/mind experience we have as human beings – Ultimately allowing for buried emotions, trauma and stress to be released.
CranioSacral very much induces an altered state, a state of deep relaxation through following and manipulating the rhythm of the fluid pumping through the cranium and spine. Rhythm is a very important aspect of the technique.
When singing a tone or frequency right at its core, overtones develop.
In CranioSacral therapy, a therapist essentially listens to the body with his/her hands, and match whatever is felt through a process called melding. By matching the resonant frequency of the body, so to speak, a heavenly element like an overtone emerges, often felt as a familiar sense of relaxation. This is why I love this work, it is much more than physical relaxation. It invokes a spiritual connection.
Through my studies in Indian spiritual practices and philosophy, I became familiar with the concept of rising kundalini energy, moving from the base of the spine, to the cranium. When this occurs, it is usually considered as the awakening of awareness. I cannot help but to notice the similarities this awakening has to the concept of CranioSacral therapy, which aims to systematically mobilize the cerebrospinal fluid running through the spinal cord.
While most people prefer to stay with the peace and serenity of a traditional CranioSacral treatment, another layer to this healing ensemble, is introducing the concept of imagery and dialogue. Through imagery and dialogue emotional release most often occurs and both client and therapist gain deeper insight into the emotional component of a physical symptom.
I believe that we always bring with us everything we have learnt so far, yet the journey never stops, and each moment is a new one to discover.

Finding your style of meditation

Meditation can be divided into three categories. It is true that one cannot exist without the other, and that practicing one form of meditation results in the practice and benefit of the others too. However, to simplify the mystery of this vast practice, I’ve decided to differentiate between the three approaches and identify some of the individual practices that can be associated with each approach.
Stillness Meditation
Awareness Meditation
Creative Meditation
Stillness meditation usually refers to having one’s entire focus on a single object or point of focus, for the purpose of quieting one’s mind.
Focusing on a single object for a prolonged period of time, results in a meditative state. Scientists have most commonly named this meditative state as the Theta brainwave state and have found it very conducive to desirable outcomes in goal setting, intention setting and creative problem solving.
The following are single focus practices:
Chanting Mantras.
Gazing at the sun.
Gazing at a candle.
Focusing on the breath.
Pranayama – breathing exercises.
Nadayama – sound repetitions.
Awareness practices teach us about our relationship to the world around us, through the relationship with ourselves. By intimately knowing how we operate at an energetic level, we gain understanding about the law of attraction, cause and effect and the changing nature of all that is. Becoming mindfully aware of our thoughts and how our thoughts affect our lives, as well as the lives of others; we have opportunity to make wiser decisions and choose a life we desire.
Examining our true desires in such a way, usually reveals our deeper desires for peace, happiness and harmony. When making choices based on these values, we live according to values the whole of humanity share at it’s core. It becomes an attractive quality which radiates outwardly and thus improve relationships of all nature positively.
Examples of awareness practices are:
Body scanning.
Observing Thoughts/Emotions
Sensory awareness
Conceptual absorption
Present moment awareness
Creative practices are ways of focusing in on a specific issue, as revealed through awareness/mindfulness, with a specific outcome in mind. One may become mindfully aware of discord between yourself and another individual, and choose to visualize a happy relationship between you.
In Tibetan practices, a practitioner may focus on the image of a deity in order to invoke those specific qualities within oneself. In Christianity, one may verbally name all those you wish healing for in prayer. These are all examples of creative meditation. Although creative meditation can be effective by itself, it is recommended to practice stillness and awareness meditation beforehand, in order to create holistically sound intentions with an enhanced focus.
Examples of creative practices are:
Creative visualization
Forgiveness practice
Healing visualization
All of the best with your meditative practice!

How do you give up an unhealthy, dysfunctional habit, whether it's drugs or compulsive thinking?

That is a very broad general question, dealing with a very personal, albeit common, problem. The approach to healing is very dependent on your personality.

My approach is to go to the root of the cause, which is always some need within yourself, which is not fulfilled. Being able to fulfill your deeper emotional needs is a tremendous step n the right direction to becoming a more wholesome person. (The “how to,” I will explain further down.)

Having said that, some people don’t have the capacity or interest to undertake that inner journey on their own, in which case I’d start identifying the external triggers. Think about ways to respond to those external triggers. For example. If a certain person’s remarks causes you to go into an negative thinking spiral, come up with an action plan to prevent it. It could be avoiding that person, having a rehearsed, empowering response back to that person, a notebook in your pocket with uplifting thoughts to grab after contact with that person, or a good friend to phone immediately that will help you prevent that negative spiral. Be creative.

If you simply want to change the negative habit with something positive, that can be easy. I know of people who replaced smoking with lemonade or water. I myself have replaced anger burst outs with laughter. I did make the conscious decision, went for a hypnotherapy session and released the pressure on myself to “get it right.”

For the deeper work, there are various methods to start working with the emotional needs you are not currently fulfilling in your own life. Inner child work is my absolute favorite. There are plenty free examples on Youtube to choose form, or if it is in your budget, receiving this as session work from a professional practitioner delivers remarkable results. Remembering (or sometimes making up) events from your childhood where a certain need was not met can be very powerful. For example, not receiving attention, being treated unfairly, being abandoned or rejected, not being heard, or being bullied, or put under unnecessary pressure. As adult you can offer the appropriate response, support and love to the innocent child you meet. This is also quite fun!

Another very powerful method to start observing and changing unhealthy reactive patterns is through mindfulness meditation. Vipassana Meditation offers worldwide courses. These however is not suitable for drug addiction or serious mental conditions, for which the first step is always finding professional assistance.

Best wishes.

Do you know how to follow your heart?

There is a lot of emphasis in the self-help industry which sells the concept of following one’s heart. The most accepted thought around this seems to be that by following your heart you are following your path of happiness.
Following one’s heart as opposed to following one’s head seem to refer to going after the experiences in life that are more meaningful to a person, where as following one’s head seem to refer to what is more logical, what makes most sense, or what seems to be right.
I have no doubt that both strategies are needed at times and they work very well in synergy with one another, however I’ve always wondered what really is meant by “following your heart.”  If ever you have been at crossroads in your life, you may agree that this kind of answer can be quite a trigger.
How is one supposed to follow your heart, and what does it even mean?
I have heard it being described as an overwhelming desire, an deep urge to fulfill, and to act on one’s dreams. If your heart is like mine, this would translate to traveling to every country in the world, eating the finest food, attending retreats and seminars which will help you grow, and spending hours with people you love. Perhaps spending hours in volunteer work, and by the end of it, quite possibly you may still wonder wether really you are following your heart? Even though all those things may make a person very happy, if it is not fulfilling the deeper needs of one’s soul, they are mere distractions.
Even the most noble ambitions and actions may simply be reactions. Reacting is to have a feeling in the body and to take action based on it, without the deeper knowing of whether the action will lead you to peace and happiness. It is like acting with wishful thinking, hoping that you will be closer to your goal, but without the courage of clear evaluation and decisive responsibility. It is no different than wanting to lose weight, yet grabbing an ice cream at the first sight of it.
To know what really to follow, a person has to know his/her core values. You can approach this task through intellectual activities, yet raising the question of your personal values will inevitably lead you to your feelings, and as soon as you realize that feelings change quite rapidly, you will be directed to use your intuition.
It is my belief and experience one has to develop intuition – a sense of knowing, in order to fulfill your deeper desires, and the way to develop one’s intuition is through meditation.
Through meditation all the immediate needs of the mind falls away until you reach the lesser immediate needs, which sometimes can be thought of as deeper desires, and yet deeper to these are our true needs, our true desires, our true wishes.
The funny thing is that there is no urgency here. These wishes, needs and desires have so much patience to be fulfilled and just touching on them, leave us with a peaceful feeling of inspiration. This knowing shines a light and shuns the anxiety of having to do the right thing, of having to follow the right dream, of having to follow one’s heart. This is a true path to bliss.

9 Steps to successful meditation

Preparation: Getting into the right mindset.
Getting into the right mindset for meditation practice may seem like a contradiction. If we use the practice of meditation to clear our minds and re-evaluate negative emotions, if the aim of the practice so to speak is to engage into a better, more positive mindset, then why would the preparation phase of getting into the right mindset be so important?
Well, during the meditation, you will be using your mind to its full capacity. That means, you will be concentrating with your mind, transcending your emotions.
Getting in the right mindset is an opportunity to mindfully acknowledge what you are currently feeling emotionally, and consciously putting your emotions aside in order for productive meditation time.
Occasionally, once you have already established a mindful meditation practice, and know the benefits of sitting in silence, you may skip over this section in order to come to a quieter place within yourself to operate from. That is completely acceptable. These steps are meant as headful guidelines. With practice your intuition will strengthen and become a stronger authority than any information outside of you.
1. Set a practice time.
It really helps to decide exactly ow much time you are willing to spend on your practice. Your practice should never take away more from your schedule than you can afford. You may find the practice so enjoyable that you go overtime with it, and end up resenting the practice for taking time out of your life. Alternatively, you may give up on the practice, not utilizing the full amount of time you put aside for it not giving it a fair try.
Initially 15 minutes a day is an excellent amount of time to commit to, but really any amount of time that you feel comfortable with will be beneficial. The key to a successful mindfulness practice is not the amount of time you spend on it each day, but the fact that you are committing to it with full attention, each day.
The purpose of meditation, is to give us time to reflect and repose from a hectic life, but mostly, it gives our minds the training on how to stay mindful during our non-meditating activities, and thus allow our experience of life to me less chaotic, more manageable, positive and peaceful.
2. Permission to take the time.
Yes, we have busy lives and taking time out of it to sit and do nothing, can sound like complete absurdity when we already have more to do than we have time for. Giving yourself permission to sit down for the practice of mindfulness is essential before starting the practice. Without this permission, your mind is likely to carry on making list  of things to do and unfinished tasks you have to remember.
When you sit down for practice, regardless if you are sitting for 5 minutes or an hour, you want to give it your everything. Time is precious after all.
Of course there are times when we have more responsibility than usual, during this time, have a little notebook by your side. During the first 5 minutes or so, right down all the things on your mind in short bullet points. Write down everything you are thinking about, have to think about later, have to decide on or take action on. Write down everything you are scared you may forget, and then give yourself permission to take the time for meditation practice.
3. Warm up your body
This step is probably the most overlooked step in meditation communities I’ve experienced. Think of meditation as a mental full body massage. You move a lot of energy! Allowing the joints to be lose, the spine to be open and your body to feel awake will fuel your practice, making it a lot more enjoyable. Warming you body up before practice is also the most effective way to clear your mind in preparation for your inner work.
3. Acceptance
At any point of day or night, we may have something we are working with in our mind. In general, every person has a dominant emotional trait, which is an undercurrent that is always present, such as worry, uncertainty anxiety, ambition, frustration. More specifically, our thoughts may be occupied with some area of our lives: relationships, health, work, creativity. Accepting our position in relation to whatever is going on in our lives, is not only the first step in clearing the way for mindfulness practice, it is also a very significant practice of mindfulness within itself.
Using the phrase: “This is the reality of my experience,” can help to remove any negative charge or judgment about the situation you find yourself in. Why we are in certain situations become irrelevant. We get to take our egos out of the experience and simply let the experience be.
Regardless of how pressing your situation, this is the moment where you give up all responsibility to it. If you are Christian, you may think of it as a situation beautifully orchestrated by god, one in which you are playing only your part. If you are Buddhist, you may look at it as an opportunity to end specific karma. You may use this opportunity to see yourself as only part of a bigger, perfect existence.
4. Remember you motivation to practice.
Here’s the thing, for most people, the motivation for practice are the results they benefit by from the practice. In other words, to start a regular practice is the hardest part. Once you have established your practice, going a day without is becomes a bit like going a day without brushing your teeth – occasionally you do it, but it just never feels that great!
It is often the contrast of the experience we seek which drives us to contemplate a practice of meditation. For me it was the constant feeling of emptiness and lack of direction and unhappiness with no apparent cause. Feelings of overwhelm, anxiety, uncertainty and unsettledness are great causes for pushing us to change our game in life.
Lack of identity, lack of creativity, lack of confidence can all contribute to you seeking a meditation practice. The desire for a deeper sense of belonging and connection in the world, or inquisitiveness about exploring spiritual realms may be another reason people get interest in taking up a practice of mediation. However, whatever the feeling or circumstance that inspired your interest in practice, defining your motivation in positive uplifting terms can be the one thing which get the practice going in moments before commencing. Your motivation becomes like your mantra. It becomes your core beliefs, and your core values.
For years the opening to my practice was: “everything is EXACTLY as it should be,” “I am EXACTLY where I am supposed to be.”
The practice:
5. Finding your sitting position.
As with every step in this sequence, this step can be a meditation on its own with incredible results.
Simply decide which position is comfortable for you to sit in, preferably with your back straight. This provides just enough tension to keep you awake so your attention can go into the practice. Once you are comfortable, stay in this position for the duration of the practice. Move as little as possible, while constantly observing the micro-movements your body makes to relax.
Feel your pelvis, you rib cage and chest, you neck face and eyes. notice the position of you hands, legs and feet, while all the time relaxing and letting go of tension you may find in these body areas.
6. Single-pointed focus.
This is the practice, also called stillness meditation.
It is through prolonged focus on one thing that a person enters the state of meditation and to me, the biggest factor to embrace during this practice is that of enjoyment. It is very difficult to continuously focus on something you do not enjoy, while it is very pleasurable to steadfastly keep your focus on something you do enjoy.
You will find that simply the freedom from multitasking, the freedom from responsibility, and the freedom from having to do more than one thing at a time, is in itself very enjoyable. However, most of us have never had that experience. Most of us have had the responsibility to watch out for ourselves all the time on so many levels, and while we are not in action of watching out for ourselves in one way or the other, we’ve  had the task of preparing mentally on how to be better, earn more or feel safer in the future.
So, removing guilt, shame and fear from second to second to enjoy focusing on only one thing from second to second, can be an adjustment, especially when you choose something seemingly meaningless to focus on, such as your breath or body part.
Choosing your object of focus.
As vipassana meditator, I am biased to believe that the most beneficial way of practice is to focus on your body. However, from my life experience, I know that meditation itself is a most intuitive process. There is absolutely no-body that knows you better than you know yourself. Nobody can make decisions for you, better than you can make yourself, contrary to what you may believe.
Therefor, choose a meditation technique that you resonate with, one that will engross you in it’s experience, and make this your practice. The only recommendation that I can strongly emphasize, is that you are able to monitor how relaxed you are staying during the process.
This is managed in two ways: 1) the rate of your breathing. 2) your body tensing up. As soon as you find your breathing becomes faster, you can know for sure that your mind is wandering off in thought, not giving you the chance of entering the state of meditation. Recall back the enjoyment for the activity you are doing, second to second.
Another way of knowing that your mind is trying to rob you of the experience of entering the state of meditation, is when you notice a body part tensing up. Usually your hand- or face muscles will be the first to betray you in such a way. When your body start tensing up, even just a little, you can know for sure that your mind is engaging in some though that will soon en up in a story, taking away form your meditative experience. Simply return to your original relaxed posture and resume your focus.
7. Lovingkindness.
Up to this point in the practice, all our emphasis has been placed in acknowledging and accepting what is. We’ve learnt how to be at peace with what is, to allow it to be as it is.
Now that your mind is focussed and still, you can use this state of mind to direct healing towards all the areas of your life and those of others you wish healing for. Not only can this part of the practice be used as an individual practice in its own right, thousands of healing modalities, practices, and therapies have been based on this particular part of the practice.
The Pali word for loving kindness is “metta.” Below is a sample of metta practice you can include in your everyday practice.

  • My heart fills with with loving kindness. I love myself. May I be happy. May I be well. May I be peaceful. May I be free.
  • May all beings in my vicinity be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May all beings in my city be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May all beings in my state be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May all beings in my country be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May all beings on my continent be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May all beings in my hemisphere be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May all beings on planet Earth be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May my parents be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May all my friends be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May all my enemies be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • May all beings in the Universe be happy. May they be well. May they be peaceful. May they be free.
  • If I have hurt anyone, knowingly or unknowingly in thought, word or deed, I ask for their forgiveness.
  • If anyone has hurt me, knowingly or unknowingly in thought, word or deed, I extend my forgiveness.

8. Take action
Yes, the practice of meditation can indeed be a pleasurable experience in itself, which ads tremendous value to your life through means of insight and relaxation. At the end of the day though, we spend most of our time not in the meditative state, but in real life with real life challenges. You may have gotten some excellent insight and inspiration on what steps to take next in bringing harmony to your life. Now is the time to take action. So, use a moment after the practice to make a strong commitment to act on your intuition.
9. Grounding & Closure
Set and intention for the day and close the ceremony off with jumping up and down, rubbing your feet, or doing a kundalini shake to get yourself fully grounded in your body and have an amazing day!

Hurricanes, Earthquakes and more.

When I was seven, I sat in a ocean pool. It was a normal summer day and we spent the morning on the beach. For some reason I found myself resting so comfortably that I didn’t move for a while. I noticed all the little fish coming to swim around me, as if I was a rock. It was a very pleasant experience – that of oneness and harmony with all that was around me.
It struck me that sitting still and observing one’s body can give you the experience of being part of nature. I considered that occurrence one of discovering a deep spiritual truth.
Through the years many more occurrences and insights of similar nature would find me. I’d feel my heart beat strongly in my chest and assume it was my boyfriend being restless next to me in bed. I’d sit on a hill in the Himalayas and feel minor earthquakes, only to later realize that it was vibration was happening from within my own body, and not without.
Much later still I’d experience sudden winds during intensive meditation retreats, only to realize that the pressure of my concentration was causing them. With time I became more efficient in concentration without the intensity, and yet I couldn’t help but become radically aware of the connection between the mind/body and nature.
A clear definition for “spiritual awakening” is hard to find, yet I find that understanding the correlation between body, mind and nature, nothing short of a spiritual awakening.
So, what does this have to do with hurricanes and earthquakes?
Just as each individual cell can be identified and combined to create an organ; just like each individual organ can be identified and is yet only part of a complete body; I believe that so too, each individual organism is part of the body of the earth.
I believe that the earth as living being, is becoming more self-aware. I believe her pulse may sometimes be experienced as an earthquake as minor trauma gets released from her body tissue, and it is a good thing.
I believe that her intensity sometimes creates wild winds and downpour, as she become intensely self-aware of her own place in nature. Earth herself, is going through her spiritual awakening.
I believe that in time she too will deeply discover and experience that she is not alone in the universe, and that consciousness will be known to all the individual parts she is made up of. I believe that as the illusion of separation disappears, that even she will be more graceful towards her inhabitants.
Yes, many may be of meaning that she already knows all this and that only man is lacking behind. My intuition, though, says not.
I accept my position as one in mutual, symbiotic growth. Not expecting more than what I myself have been given, and thus taking full responsibility of what I have, what I can further develop and discover. Thus, I fore – give. I give the space for healing to happen at cost of our comfort and I get excited for the greater awareness we will all share inherently as result.
As for our human contribution to the evolution of consciousness – the discovery of oneness; for us natural disasters provide an opportunity to give, to share, to suffer together and experience camaraderie as result of it. For us human beings, events of uncertainty facilitate re-evaluation of values, ultimately re-membering us in love.
“We each have a sixth sense that is attuned to the oneness dimension in life, providing a means for us to guide our lives in accord with our ideas.”  – Henry Reed
With all of my love.

Have you ever decided to just forgive?

Have you ever decided to just forgive everyone you know of?
That person who didn’t meet your expectation, the person who failed to understand you, the person who refuses to meet your requests or needs, that person who is self-centered beyond your comprehension, that person who causes jealousy within you, or triggers you, that person who is mean, ungraceful, distant, greedy, ignorant, unyielding, controlling, absent, or who you simply do not like.
Have you ever thought of simply forgiving all of these people?
People near and far, close to you in sentiment, or celebrities and public figures you have never met, people who have passed away or who never got to be born – what would it be like to take the time and send a moment of forgiveness to all of these people, forgiveness for the way they made you feel and then forgiveness to yourself for allowing yourself have been affected undesirably.
If ever you have done this practice, you would have noticed how light you felt afterwards, how empowered and free of fear. You would have felt a certain calmness. You would have observed that you are not left with a passive feeling, the one that allows people to walk all over you, instead you are left charged up and ready to take on the world. In forgiveness, there is no hint of defeat, only the courageous sensibility of a warrior of peace.
There is a Buddhist meditation practice called Metta Bhavana, which means to cultivate kindness. No meditation is complete without adding this little step to the practice, and standing boldly in forgiveness is no different that cultivating loving kindness.
What is keeping you form feeling at ease right now? Why not take this moment for the practice of forgiveness and let us know how it went. Soon this may become a regular habit and fill you with emotional freedom always. I wish you peace and happiness.

Are you addicted to the internet?

The Buddha says that it is our attachment that is the cause of all suffering. Life is full of attachment. In the most severe form we think of addiction. Drugs, alcohol, sex and gambling are all addictions society has labeled as pretty serious and dysfunctional. Yet, we live with many so many addictions not labeled as addiction by society.
Surfing the internet is an addiction. Here I am with so many beautiful books to read, so many moments to experience, yet how much of that precious time goes into surfing the net in order to find the answer to my problems, the escape to my boredom, the company to my loneliness.
Without realizing it, I search for happiness through the internet. Have I ever considered it to be an addiction? Of course not, being connected online is a lifestyle.
It is the way through which my creativity is shared, the way I keep in contact with my friends and family, the platform to advertise and run my business from. At times it acts as my medical advisor, my dictionary, my school. It raises my awareness and sometimes it sets me at ease.
How many hours do I sit do research to plan ahead, to find memories of the past or to compare my experience with others’, all in the name of finding clarity? It is like having a mind outside of my mind, and I am intensely attached to it.
I wonder what my  life would be without it? I am not suggesting to myself to go without, yet how much of my lack of peace can I ascribe to losing time on a habit I never before thought of as destructive? Even when I sit in peace outside and the stream of inspiration passes through me, I reach for my blog page to write on.
The challenge is to set new standards, to create little rituals away from our computers and to connect with life, real life, life that emanate from the trees outside, life that falls on our skin in the form of cool air, life that reaches us through the neighborhood sounds, life that energizes us when we hum a tune.
I set this new standard to myself now to experience life once again as a sensory experience. Will you meet me there?

Do Healers Underestimate Your Intelligence?

Have you ever paid a lot of money to get a reading, healing or therapy session?
Afterwards you felt great for an hour or so, the interaction was quite pleasurable, yet you didn’t feel like you gained a whole lot. In fact you more got the sense that you were the one giving 1. your money, 2. your time, 3. your energetic support to fulfill their life dream; but what about yours?
Have you ever walked away from a reading, healing or therapy session and felt that you weren’t fully heard or listened to or understood?
Or, have you been in a session where you were told that all the answers were inside of you and you felt pressured to simply answer something to satisfy your service provider and get done with the session, regardless of how true or meaningful it was to you?
There is a perfectly good reason for all that. You are an infinitely unique and complex being. The answers you seek to your life questions are formed from your unique life experiences, your unique life understanding and your unique motivations in life. The only way another person can guide you through healing is if they have been through something similar enough to understand and then too with a similar mind as yours in order to really understand what you are going through. Your healer or therapist can only take you as far as he or she has been.
Does this make you feel even more isolated and alone? If so you are probably much further along your own path of understanding than you realize. Our journey of self-discovery doesn’t end, and there comes a time to surrender to the inner knowing, as uncertain as it may seem.
There comes a time when answers from the outside will simply no longer serve you, because you know yourself better than anyone. You know when self-inquiry in order to heal no longer serves you and when self-inquiry in order to serve is best suited. Let the dissatisfaction of finding the guidance you seek push you deeper into your spiritual practice and take the risk to live in the realm of personal power. There is a saying that a any fool can learn from a wise person, however only a very wise person can learn form a fool.
Where is your practice at?
If the wide spectrum of wisdom has been opened up for you and you and your learning is by choice, rather than necessity, let service be the motivator.
Sitting still following one’s own breath brings about that calmness of mind to stop thinking and start living – To stop having the same thoughts over and over again, and to start using new thoughts to move ourselves into motion. This is the power of change. This is the power of self-authority. This is called Self-Empowerment.